Wanna break out of your shell? Are you tired of playing it safe and suppressing your inner sass? Do you want to tap into your inner seductress and manifest a life that’s full of passion, power, and pleasure? Then it’s time to help you find your inner Jezebel. Let’s talk about how to create a vision board, to grow your fierce sensuality.

Who was Jezebel, anyway?

Jezebel was a biblical bad girl, known for her fierce independence, her love of luxury, and her unapologetic sensuality. She was a queen who refused to conform to societal norms, and instead, forged her own path. And that’s exactly what we’re going to tap into with this vision board – your inner Jezebel, the one who’s not afraid to take risks, to be bold, and to demand what she wants. Perhaps I should cover Jezebel in the next edition of Lust & Lore? Let me know in the comments!

Why Do I Need a Vision Board?

Wild women shouldn’t be tamed. As a huge fan of wild women, myself, I knew I wanted to be one. In a world that often tries to tame our wildness and stifle our desires, a vision board is a powerful tool to help you reclaim your inner Jezebel. If you’re a visual person, it helps you get clear on your vision.

A vision board is a visual representation of your desires–a collage of images, words, and textures that evoke feelings and emotions. By creating a vision board, you’re taking ownership of your outcomes. For this one, we are going to focus on your sensuality, celebrating your uniqueness, and manifesting a life that honors your deepest desires.

If nothing else, it’s a way to get a clear vision of what you want to be, or what you want to do. Sometimes we don’t know what we want, until we put it together and see it for ourselves!

How to Create a Vision Board to Find Your Inner Jezebel

Gather your materials:

• A large piece of cardboard, paper, or canvas
• Magazines, scissors, and glue
• Markers, paint, or colored pencils
• Photographs, fabrics, and other textures
• Any personal items that hold significance to your sensuality (e.g., a piece of lingerie, a rose petal, or a love letter)

Set Your Intention

Find a quiet, comfortable space where you can relax and tap into your inner world. Take a few deep breaths, and ask yourself: “What does my inner Jezebel look like? What does she want, and what does she deserve?” Allow your thoughts to flow, and write down your intentions.

Gather Your Inspiration

Flip through magazines, and cut out images that evoke feelings of sass, seduction, and empowerment. These can be images of strong women, luxurious settings, or sensual art. Collect words and phrases that resonate with your intentions, such as “unstoppable,” “fearless,” or “unapologetic.”

Create Your Vision Board

Begin arranging your images, words, and textures on your board. Group similar themes together, or create a flowing narrative that tells the story of your inner Jezebel’s journey. Add personal items that hold significance to your sensuality, and don’t be afraid to get creative with colors, shapes, and patterns.

Activate Your Board

Hang your vision board in a place where you’ll see it daily, such as your bedroom or meditation space. Take a few moments each day to gaze at your board, allowing the images and words to sink deep into your subconscious. Repeat your intentions out loud, and feel the energy of your inner Jezebel manifesting in your life.

Tips and Variations

• Create a digital vision board on Pinterest or Canva, and set it as your phone’s wallpaper or computer background.
• Invite friends over for a vision board party, and explore each other’s inner Jezebels.
• Update your vision board seasonally, reflecting your growth and evolution as a sensual being.

A vision board is a powerful tool to connect with your inner Jezebel, to manifest your desires, and to celebrate your unique sensuality. By embracing your inner Jezebel, you’re not only becoming the best version of yourself, but you’re also contributing to a world that honors and celebrates women’s power and sensuality. So, take the first step, and create a vision board today.

Sometimes couples are intimidated by sex toys, and that’s okay! When it comes to intimacy, sometimes we need a little extra boost to keep sparks flying. If you haven’t yet, perhaps it’s time to take your sex life to the next level. One way to do this is by incorporating sex toys into your sex life, with your partner/s.

Not only can sex toys enhance pleasure and excitement, but they can also foster deeper connection and help partners learn more about how the other person experiences pleasure. There are so many benefits of using sex toys for couples, and today we have some hot tips and unique toy recommendations to give you a boost, whether you’re in close proximity or even via long distance, to ensure you’re giving each other pleasure no matter what!

Some of the links in this blog may be affiliate links. Please read my affiliate disclosure here.

Why Couples Should Try Using Toys in the Bedroom

Using sex toys as a couple can really enhance your intimacy in ways you may not expect! If you or your partner have any taboos surrounding sex, a simply vibrating toy can break down inhibitions and allow some freedom during sensual exploration.

Sex toys can also help to increase intimacy and closeness, as couples work together to find what works best for them. Additionally, using sex toys can add an element of excitement and adventure to the bedroom, keeping things fresh and exciting. It’s awfully nice to shake things up once in awhile.

Using sex toys as a couple can spice up your sex life and lead to more intense and varied experiences. Here are some benefits:

• Enhanced Exploration: Toys allow couples to discover new turn-ons and sensations together.
• Increased Intimacy: The shared experience can bring couples closer together, breaking inhibitions in the bedroom.
• Improved Communication: Both inside and out of the bedroom.
• Accessibility: Sex toys can cater to different needs and preferences, making them suitable for all couples regardless of ability or genitalia.
• Fun and Pleasure: Simply put, toys are fun!

The Importance of Lube

Before you begin penetrating your partner or yourself with toys, it’s essential to talk about lube.

Lubricant is a crucial component of any sexual experience, as it helps to reduce friction and increase pleasure. Lube is not just a complement to sex toys; it’s a crucial component of sexual health and pleasure

When choosing a lube, look for one that is water-based or silicone-based, as these are generally safe to use with most sex toys. Avoid oil-based lubes, as they can damage certain materials. Here are a couple of benefits to including lube in your sexual hygiene:

• Enhances Natural Lubrication: If there are any issues with natural lubrication, this increases safety and pleasure during sexual activity.
• Enhances Sensation: Lube can make sexual experiences more comfortable and pleasurable.
• Ensures Safety: Using lube reduces prevent condom breakage and tissue tearing, reducing the risk of infections and STDs.

If you’re a bit on the sensitive side, I highly recommend Sliquid Lube. My kitty seems to be a precious princess, and not just any lube will do. This product has changed my perspective on lube, and doesn’t throw off my pH. It’s not sticky or smelly, and it’s made with all-natural ingredients. Not to mention, this company has won MANY awards in the intimate industry. It’s a favorite amongst the industry for a reason, so I humbly suggest you give it a try.

Top Sex Toys for Couples

Partners are now enabled to explore new ways of pleasing each other, but some toys are simply meant for enhancing intercourse. This may be an excellent introduction, for those interested in getting their feet wet! These are some of the most talked about sex toys for couples on the market!

Some of these are mostly geared towards penis-in-vagina sex, however we cannot think of any reason why these wouldn’t also serve any couple, for dozens of reasons, regardless of their genitalia.

We-Vibe Sync

The We-Vibe Sync is a wearable vibrator designed to stimulate both partners during penetrative sex, with delicious vibrations. It’s compact and adjustable, ensuring a perfect fit that is “smooth as silk”.

Features:

• Worn during intercourse
• Provides dual stimulation for the G-spot and clitoris
• Adjustable to fit the wearer’s body
• Can be controlled remotely for added convenience

LeloTiani3

The LeloTiani3 is a premium remote-controlled couples’ massager that ensures satisfaction. It’s sleek, powerful, and versatile, suitable for both internal and external stimulation.

Features:

• Remote-controlled for versatile use
• Offers both internal and external stimulation
• Features SenseMotion technology for a more intuitive experience
• Made with body-safe silicone

Lovehoney Magic Wand

The Lovehoney Magic Wand is a powerful vibrator known for its deep, rumbly vibrations. It’s the perfect tool for relaxing tension and enhancing sexual pleasure. Try delivering a body massage, using this in tandem with your hands. And when the heat picks up, you can use this for extra stimulation.

Features:

• Provides intense or targeted stimulation, depending on how it’s used
• Features a soft, cushioned head for comfort
• Offers variable speeds for customizable pleasure
• Powerful vibrations that can be felt even through clothing

Incorporating sex toys for couples like these can revolutionize your sexual experiences. These toys not only add excitement and variety but also encourage intimacy and communication between partners. Get excited and try something new! Remember, the key to a memorable and pleasurable experience is often in the preparation.

What is Ethical Porn? Well, it’s a whole lot of fun, I’ll tell you that much!

There is growing interest in a more ethical and inclusive approach in pornography, in recent years. The people are beginning to yearn for diverse looks and genders, and real bodies. That means there is a plethora of good porn being created with “real life” sensibilities in mind.

You may have heard about porn for women, feminist porn, or other “buzz” words. They all point in the same direction, creating an intersectionality between porn made with ethics in mind, and general diversity in content.

The Ethical Porn movement seeks to challenge the adult entertainment status quo, by offering up realistic, respectful porn with actors that are compensated fairly for their work.

Now that’s sexy.

What is Ethical Porn?

Ethical porn emphasizes fair labor practices, equal pay, and a safe working environment. This type of porn also seeks to represent diverse bodies, desires, and sexual experiences, moving away from the traditional, narrow, and often oppressive representations of women in mainstream porn.

Pay For Your Porn, Buddy

In my world, sex work is real work, and performers deserve to be compensated fairly for their talent, performance, and offering up their nude body for your gooning. Free porn is everywhere, but you really know nothing about the production.

Recognize the value of paying for porn. By supporting the right sites, you’re contributing to a more equitable and respectful industry. So pat yourself on the back, for supporting this erotic art form. You’re creating more demand, which means more productions to go around for everyone!

10 Great Ethical Porn Sites for Women

Here are some excellent ethical porn sites that prioritize performer welfare, diversity, and realistic representations of sexuality:

• Erika Lust: One of my favorite sites to review, with beautiful cinematic content that comes from the hearts and minds female directors.
• QueerCrush: Director Electra Rayne brings beautiful, unscripted stories to life, with a diverse cast and an all Sapphic team.
• CrashPadSeries: A queer, feminist porn site featuring a diverse cast of performers and a focus on consent and communication.
• PinkLabel.TV: Definitely one of my favorites on the list. This is a fair trade porn site showcasing hundreds of videos with a wide range of sexual experiences.
• BrightDesire: This site showcases a range of sexual experiences. This is a queer-heavy site, so if that’s your preference, you’ll absolutely love it here.
• Bellesa: Porn by Women, for real. They pull together sexy, passionate porn from other sites, to bring femme-friendly content you may not find otherwise.

Making the choice to consume ethical porn for women is an essential step towards a more inclusive and respectful adult entertainment industry. Remember that when you support these sites, you’re contributing to an environment conducive to welfare of the performers, diversity, and inclusivity.

If you would like to hear more about these sites, or would like me to review any specific scenes, please make a comment below, or find me on social media!

Welcome to the second volume of Pleasure Principles, the second Volume to my How To Masturbate series for those that own vaginas! Check out the first edition Pleasure Principles: Vol. 1 – Intro To The Vulva & Vagina here.

In this edition, we’ll cover the basics of sex toys. We’ll cover everything from nipple stimulators, dildos, bullets, vibrators, and clitoral suckers to get you started on your way to self-pleasure, without use of your own hands.

We’ll discuss the safest ways to use toys, how to keep them clean, and provide tips for maintaining discretion.

I’ll hold your hand. Let’s just call it “Mutual Masturbation”.

Pleasure Principles: Volume II – A Guide to Sex Toys for Vulvas and Vaginas

Nipple Stimulation

Nipple stimulators are a fantastic way to enhance your solo play sessions, with something a little atypical of many users when they learn how to masturbate. These toys work by providing intense and focused stimulation to your nipples. Here are some popular types and tips for using them safely:

• Nipple Clamps: These come in various styles, from simple clips to adjustable screw clamps. Start with beginner-friendly options and gradually explore more intense ones as you become accustomed to the sensation.These are also excellent for partner play, but that’s another blog!
• Suction Cups: These create a vacuum-like suction around your nipples, increasing blood flow and sensitivity.
• Vibrating Nipple Toys: These combine vibration with clamps or suction cups for added pleasure.

Safe Use and Cleaning:

• Always start with clean toys and hands.
• Apply a small amount of lube to the nipple area to enhance sensation and reduce friction.
• Begin with gentle pressure and gradually increase intensity as desired.
• Clean your toys after each use with warm water and mild soap or a toy cleaner.
• Store them in a cool, dry place, away from direct sunlight.

How to Masturbate with Dildos

Dildos are classic sex toys designed for penetrative pleasure. In this section, we are specifically discussing the type of dildo that is manual, requiring use of your own hand to thrust them inside of yourself. This gives you a great chance to get truly intimate with yourself and see what you REALLY like. Dildos come in various shapes, sizes, and materials to cater to different preferences. There are even thrusting dildos, themed, and vibrating toys to choose from!

Here’s how to use them safely and effectively:

• Materials: Choose body-safe materials like silicone, glass, or stainless steel.
• Sizes: Start with smaller sizes and gradually work your way up if you must! It takes time to decide what you really like.
• Lubrication: Always use a generous amount of water-based lube for smoother penetration.

Safe Use and Cleaning:

• Wash your dildo with warm water and mild soap before and after each use.
• Dry it thoroughly to prevent mold and bacteria growth.
• Store it in a clean, dry place, preferably in a toy bag or container.

Bullets and Vibrators

Bullets and vibrators are versatile toys that can be used for both clitoral and internal stimulation, depending on the type you purchase. Tip: If you purchase a bullet vibrator and want to experience the fun sensations inside of yourself without risk, put the toy inside of a condom. That will make it easier to pull out when you’re finished! Keep yourself our of the ER. 👀

Vibrators come in various shapes and sizes, with different vibration settings to cater to different preferences. I recommend choosing one with a variety of settings, to increase versatility in your experience.

Types of Vibrators:

• Bullets: Small and discreet, perfect for targeted clitoral stimulation.
• Vibrators: Larger and more versatile, suitable for both internal and external use.
• Dildo: In the shape of a dildo, but battery-powered to vibrate on command while you use it to thrust.

Safe Use and Cleaning:

• Always use a water-based lube for comfort and enhanced sensation.
• Wash your toy with warm water and mild soap after each use.
• Store it in a clean, dry place, away from direct sunlight.

Clitoral Suckers

Ah yes, my personal favorite of the bunch! Clitoral suckers use suction and vibration to provide intense clitoral stimulation. They are designed to mimic the sensation of oral sex and really amplify solo fun with new sensations you don’t usually get on your own. Choose from handheld devices or wearable options for hands-free pleasure, to choose how to masturbate. There aren’t too many variants of this toy, other than some being enabled for fully hands-free fun! Choose a model that has divverent vibration and suction settings to find your perfect rhythm.!

Make sure to check out my sex toy reviews for some of my favorite clitoral suckers.

Safe Use and Cleaning:

• Apply a small amount of water-based lube to the clitoral area for comfort and enhanced sensation.
• Wash your toy with warm water and mild soap after each use.
• Store it in a clean, dry place, away from direct sunlight.

Tips for Discretion

Maintaining privacy and discretion is essential when exploring yourself, intimately.. Here are some tips to help you keep your play sessions private:

• Soundproofing: Choose a toy that has positive reviews for sound, or go with a manual toy. Use a blanket, pillow, or towel to muffle any sounds that may emanate from your own pleasure.
• Storage: Store your toys in a discreet, locked drawer or container.
• Timing: Choose a time when you’re unlikely to be interrupted, just as you might for a meditation session. After all, orgasms are spiritual events. 😇

We hope that by understanding the basics of different types of toys and learning how to masturbate safely can go a long way in your personal self-love sessions. Stay safe, stay clean, and enjoy all the good vibrations you’ll most certainly have cumming!

With Love,

Amara

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Welcome to another edition of “Beyond the DD,” where I discuss my “Big Boob Problems” from my real life experience of having actual big boobs! This is mostly just for funsies, because I am well-aware that having larger breasts is often seen as desirable. As with many desirable things; it ain’t all it’s cracked up to be!

In Part 1 of this series, I discussed how I even inherited such a pair. In addition, I covered my range of sizes, having been all the way up to 42K at one point! Throughout my experiences, I learned much about how bra sizes work (Thank you, ABTF), and how to manage the logistics around having these two things strapped to my chest at all times.

Beyond the DD, Part 2 – Avert Your Eyes

Today, we’re discussing how much I wish people could Avert Their Eyes! 😆 If you’re a fellow busty woman, you know that bouncing boobs don’t just occur all the time. Perhaps those big mommy milkers truly ARE a marvel! Or perhaps some folks simply have not seen boobs that big before, in person.

In reality, I am somewhat small in stature, with a curvy physique. There really is no point in hammering out the reasons. The point is that it happens, and it can get quite uncomfortable at times.

Big Boob Problems – Invasive Staring

As a busty woman, I have learned to at least appear as if I have tunnel vision. It keeps me out of trouble, and keeps me from making unwanted eye contact. While I may appear aloof, trust–I am paying attention!

Be that as it may, some people truly are not as sly as they seem to think.

Men with girlfriends? You’re not slick. If your girl didn’t see you, I sure did. So does anyone I am with, including friends and romantic partners.

Have you ever had a flock of teenage boys trying to sneak a peek on the sly? Look, virgins. There are 10 of you. You look ridiculous.

Unfortunately, you have to have some level of awareness when you’re in public, as a woman. If you don’t think we’re picking up on something, most of us definitely are. Like the man I caught getting video of me at Target! 🫠

No, I Don’t Always Want to Be Perceived

On occasion, I have been known to drop a thirst trap.

However, that’s me in control of the perception. I am making a choice at that moment to be perceived in a certain way. As an introverted and mildly misanthropic person, I very likely do not want to talk to strangers. Sometimes I am in a sociable mood, and am more receptive to public attention.

These are the times when I’m dressed in line with how I want to be perceived. Though, sometimes, I wish people would just leave me alone. Then I may not feel as if I have to dress in shapeless clothes, just to avoid unwanted attention when I go to the store to pick some avocados.

Perhaps I should wear a sign!

Ain’t My Fault They’re Big

A few years ago I saw a woman online, annoyed that someone asked her to cover up. This woman was well-endowed, and was justifiably upset that someone wasn’t minding her damn business. She said, “it ain’t my fault my titties are big!”

While there may be admirers, there are also plenty of haters. If I do choose to show off what I’ve got, that’s my choice to make. Receiving hate for it is just as much of a struggle, because *I* didn’t make this choice. These BIG NATTYS came on their own, baby.

Finding My Peace

Be that as it may, these are not things I can help, in others. Just as much as they cannot help that I have big honkin’ juicy mommy milkers.

We cannot expect strangers to know and understand our boundaries. We can only do what makes us feel comfortable in any given moment, regardless of what’s happening around us. Acceptance is all about learning what you can and cannot control.

They’re exhibiting their nature. They can help how they are, but sometimes we just have to accept that some people will always be who they are and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Have you had issues accepting your body, for better or worse? Do you have Big Boob Problems? Or maybe you just like huge boobs! Let me know in the comments!

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Cake Sitting–you know what? I’m kinda into it. Let me explain. 🎂

Welcome to another edition of “What it is and How to Do it” for Sexually Speaking here on Peach Kisser. Today I want to explore the naughty world of cake sitting with you, because I am actually quite intrigued by this particular kink, myself. This is a truly delightful decadent fetish that really frosts our cakes!

Beyond the sheer visual appeal, cake sitting taps into various kinks and sensory experiences. Practitioners combine the sensual pleasure of texture play with the visual feast of food in a sexual context (like sitophilia). As such, Cake Sitting has steadily gained popularity in the adult community with more and more content and creators dedicated to the craft.

This act involves exactly what it sounds like: sitting on a cake, often while nude or scantily clad, allowing the cake to be crushed under the weight of the body. This creates a messy spectacle, and is oddly surprisingly to enjoy getting into each and every crevice! If you don’t believe me, feel free to explore it yourself. (*ahem*plenty is available on tube sites*ahem*).

As a form of sploshing, this is versatile activity that can cater to a wide range of preferences, all the way down to cake decorations and even HOW the cake is smashed!

Cake Sitting Types

This fetish is usually pretty straight forward. Let’s just keep things uncomplicated! Here are a few ways people indulge in this naughty, messy fantasy:

• “Classic” Cake Sit: The most straightforward form where the individual sits directly on a whole cake, usually with the lower half of the body exposed in a thong or fully nude.
• “Messy” Cake Sit: Focuses on the aftermath, showcasing the mess created by the act, with frosting and cake crumbs clinging to the skin.
• “Sensual” Cake Sit: Emphasizes the tactile sensation of the cake against the skin, often incorporating close-up shots and slow, deliberate movements.
• “Dominant/Submissive” Cake Sit: Incorporates power dynamics, where one partner may force the other to sit on the cake as a form of humiliation or control.
  Features and Acts within the Cake Sitting Fetish
• “Cake Destruction” where the focus is on the act of demolishing the cake with various body parts.
• “Cake Worship” involves a submissive showing reverence to the cake, often licking or eating it off the dominant’s body.
• “Cake Play” can include using the cake as a sexual aid, or incorporating it into foreplay.

As you can see, you can get as specific as you’d like!

Let Them Sit on Cake

What’s that you say? You’re ready to sit on some cake? 🎂  Here are some tips to get started.

• Watch some videos! It’s nice to see someone else enjoy it first, before you get into it yourself. Sometimes we don’t know what we like until we see/experience it!
• Start with a Small Cake to test your comfort level with the sensation and the mess.
• Choose the Right Cake for your desired aesthetic and texture. A dense cake like a fruitcake will behave differently from a light sponge cake.
• Set the Scene with the right ambiance. Dim the lights, add some music, and ensure you have a space that’s easy to clean.
• Incorporate Other Foods like whipped cream, chocolate sauce, or fruit to enhance the sensory experience.
• Experiment with Temperature by using warm or cold cakes to add another layer of sensation.
• Capture the Moment with a camera to immortalize your cake sitting adventure and potentially share it with an audience that appreciates this unique fetish.

Cake sitting is a rich and layered fetish, and can be as decadent as you choose. Just like with any cake! It’s an act that celebrates the joy of letting go, allowing us to enjoy unique and pleasurable physical and visual sensations! Whether you’re a content creator looking to explore new kinks or an individual seeking to spice up your intimate life, cake sitting offers a delicious way to please even the naughtiest sweet tooth!

Who is into roleplaying? There are so many fun ways to bond intimately with your partner in this cozy season. At least for those of us that experience Winter. Sometimes we need to add a little extra fuel to the fire to keep our home hearth smoldering. You’ll want to dig into these Santa Role-Playing ideas, and roast those chestnuts!

The Naughty List: Santa Role-Playing Ideas To Spice Up Christmas Night

The holiday season is upon us, and what better way to get into the spirit than with some sexy Santa role-playing in the bedroom? Whether you’re a seasoned pro or a newbie to the world of role-play, we’ve got some ideas to get those sleigh bells jingling and your partner’s heart racing.

Create a Festive Atmosphere

First things first, set the mood with a festive atmosphere. Transform your bedroom into a winter wonderland with Christmas lights, garlands, and a mini Christmas tree. This will help you and your partner get into character and feel like you’re in a holiday fantasy. Don’t forget to add some festive tunes to the playlist to really get you in the mood.

Sexy Santa Role Playing Costumes

Next, it’s time to get dressed up in your sexiest Santa or elf costume. For the ladies, a Mrs. Claus outfit with a twist, like a mini skirt or lingerie, is sure to get your partner’s attention. And for the gentlemen, a Santa hat, beard, and coat will make you the hottest Claus in town. Don’t be afraid to get creative and DIY your own costumes – after all, it’s the thought that counts, not the price tag.

Christmas Food Play

Now, onto the fun stuff – food play! Use festive foods like candy canes, holly berries, or Christmas cookies as props for sensual play. Create a “sleigh” of treats, like strawberries, grapes, or chocolate-covered cherries, to feed each other. And for the more indulgent, try using “naughty” treats like whipped cream or chocolate sauce to add an extra layer of excitement to your play.

Elf’s Toybox

Every elf needs a toybox, and we’re not talking about the kind that’s filled with toys for the kiddos. Create a “toybox” of goodies, like sex toys or lingerie, to discover and play with. This can add an extra level of excitement and surprise to your role-play, as you never know what treats you might find inside. Just remember to communicate with your partner about what’s inside the toybox and make sure you’re both comfortable with the activities.

Getting into Character

Now that you’ve got your costume and toybox, it’s time to get into character. Watch some Christmas movies or read some Christmas stories to get into the holiday spirit. Practice your Santa or elf accent and mannerisms to really get into character. And why not create a backstory for your Santa or elf character to add some depth to the scenario? This can help you really get into the role and make the experience even more immersive.

Scenes and Scenarios

Finally, it’s time to play out your scenario. Try playing out a “naughty or nice” scenario, where one partner has to earn their gifts or privileges. Or create a “Santa’s workshop” scene, where one partner has to help the other build a toy or complete a task. You could even try a “Christmas morning” scenario, where one partner wakes the other up with a surprise gift or activity. The possibilities are endless, so get creative and have fun!

And there you have it, folks – our top picks for sexy Santa role-playing ideas for the bedroom. Whether you’re a seasoned pro or just looking to spice up your holiday season, we hope these ideas have given you some inspiration. Remember to always communicate with your partner and prioritize consent and safety above all else. And most importantly, have fun and get into the holiday spirit!

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If you’ve never been introduced, we think you could use an introduction with some fun Temperature Play tips! As an ever-curious person, I can testify to the allure, but I also feel like it’s a very “safe” and “vanilla” way to dabble in enhanced, sensual play and BDSM. If you’re new to kinkier concepts, maybe consider first that BDSM is a wide spectrum of activities that don’t necessarily involve whips and chains– but that’s another blog post!

Pleasure and pain has been likely the most mainstream aspect of BDSM. While I won’t be diving into the spectrum of what that covers, today we’re only discussing a singular aspect that can be used in multiple ways to achieve new heights of pleasure, new sensations and create some enjoyable intimacy. The book Hurts So Good: The Science and Culture of Pain on Purpose explores even the more casual ways humans engage in masochism (the M of BDSM, from tattoos to even people who eat insanely spicy food, on purpose.

Temperature play doesn’t even have to cause pain. It can be as simple as kissing someone’s back with cold lips, or adding a chilling sensation to another body part.

Some of the links in this blog may be affiliate links. Please read my affiliate disclosure here.

What is Temperature Play?

If you came up groomed as a hetero female, you’ve probably heard the Cosmo-derived advice of, “suck on an ice cube before you go down”. Look, they’re barely even capable of using the word “penis,” but they’re onto something.

No one ever said that there isn’t such a thing as light BDSM, and realistically, that is anything outside of traditional, analog sex. The reality is, it can be fun way to spice things up. BDSM is your friend, even in a “vanilla” relationship”.

It can be as delicate or as masochistic as you want, especially when play involves heat.

Temperature Play Ideas

Some fun temperature play ideas that go beyond the typical can be fun experimentation, and can be as tame as you desire. The term “Temperature Play” is pretty broad, and usually encompasses the application of heat or cold, in the bedroom. Today, we’ll cover a few forms, to give you some ideas for the next time you’re in need of a little experimentation!

But first– let’s discuss a little bit of safety. You should be prepared for any potential burns, and make sure you aren’t removing ice directly from the freezer to produce sensations in your partner or yourself. Ice and Heat can damage the skin, so please take these safety considerations into account when you engage in temperature play for the first time.

Have something on hand to reverse whatever you’re doing. For example, keep cool water nearby for heat, or warming blankets and pads near for cold play. Make sure safety is at the top of mind, when engaging in this or any BDSM play. Utilize safe words if it helps you and your partner feel more comfortable, during your playtime.

At the end of the day, you are responsible for your and your partner’s safety, along with their consent. Now, let’s get down to the good stuff!

Ice/Cold Play Tips

Ice Play is often where many people begin, and can encompass a lot of action. Be wary of cold burns, and keep warming items on hand, should your partner need them. Warm water, towels, and blankets make for excellent accompaniments. You can incorporate ice/cold play in the following ways:

• Freeze a Glass Dildo for Insertion, or other sex toys
• Ice Cubes for melting on your partner’s nipples, skin, and other erogenous zones.
• Ice cubes to cool your mouth before oral stimulation
• Let an ice cube melt in their belly button
• Use to increase sensations on your partner’s body before performing upon them.
• Use Cold Food to lap up, from your partner’s body
• Induce pain, with pleasure. Responsibly.

Fire/Heat Play Tips

This is a fairly common kink. Personally, my first exposure to this was in the music video to Ricky’s Martin’s 1999 smash hit, “Livin’ la Vida Loca”. Anyone else remember that? Just me? Okay then.

Again, keep your partner’s safety in mind. Make sure you know how to treat a burn (both hot and cold) as accidents do happen. Here are some Fire Play Safety Tips, but here are some fun ways to play with varying degrees of heat in the mean time!

• Hot Towels
• Warming Massages
• Warming a glass or stainless steel sex toys
• Wax Play / Candle Wax (tip, do not use just any candle wax. There are candles manufactured for the explicit purpose of temperature play.)
• Carefully playing with fire, near or directly onto a person’s skin. Responsibly.
• Use of Topicals – Massage Oils, etc.

Some experts may recommend topicals which contain compounds like capsaicin. While topicals like this can provide unique sensations, it’s important to note that they can damage and burn skin. Maybe one day I’ll regale you with a story about accidental temperature play and capsaicin ointment, but that’s… another blog. 🙈 On that note, I’ll leave you with one last temperature play tip:

Capsaicin is best removed from the skin with dish soap.

It’s Playtime!

As always, any form of kink or BDSM must be approached with consent and a detailed discussion about personal limits and desires. If you’re looking for more specific Temperature Play Tips, please feel free to reach out to me on Twitter/X, or comment on the blog below!

Listen to your partner, play wisely and safely, and you’ll have something fun to incorporate into your routine whenever you’d like!

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As I was surfing through threads today, I came across this clip from people of Pamela Anderson make-up free over and over. I’m just in awe; I cannot stop thinking about it.

Pamela came to fame as a sex symbol, and these types of figures have historically been polarizing on society at large. While they’re prized and praised for their beauty, they’re deeply sexualized and thus seen as immoral by certain demographics. As such, I believe a lot of people have preconceived notions about her that tainted their perception of Pamela Anderson as an older woman. She was fortunate to be beautiful and got paid for it! However you may feel about her youthful antics: you weren’t the same person as you were 30 years ago, were you?

If you are–well, I suggest some positive self-reflection. 🤧

 

View on Threads

 

A True Symbol of Beauty – Make-up Free Pamela Anderson

This is the very clip I keep watching. She’s beautiful. I’m elated just looking at her, with her imperfect skin, crystal clear eyes; proudly wearing her wrinkles. She’s glowing in a way a woman only does when they finally feel free.

I feel like her soul is free, without the pressure of being youthful and performative bombshell appearances. The internet discourse about Make-up Free Pamela Anderson is so funny to me, because it doesn’t make sense. So many people praise or criticize her going make-up free, with a variety of claims about her appearance. More and more, it becomes clear to me that maybe some people don’t fully understand what it means for Pamela Anderson to be without make-up. People don’t seem to take her seriously because of her past, which I feel is a grave miscalculation.

I saw claims that she has had surgical and skin procedures most of us had not.

Now, Pamela Anderson was always naturally beautiful, with the “classic beauty” face. She maintained it. After a certain point, she did get fillers and botox. Eventually, she had the fillers removed and stated that she is no longer interested in those procedures in more recent interviews.

This is a pretty good breakdown of the work she has had over the years:

Many are objectively beautiful, but it takes a certain spark to become an icon like Pamela Anderson. And she still has that spark!

 

I keep gazing upon her. She doesn’t look like she aged in a superhuman way, like many stars these days like to portray well into their 50s. Pamela is in her late fifties. Her skin is imperfect and uneven, she’s got wrinkles, smile lines, and more.What she did NOT do, was try to maintain her same appearance that made her famous to begin with.

You may see the same signs of aging on yourself. And yet, she still radiates the same sparkling energy that helped make her a full-blown sex symbol, to begin with.

But that’s exactly the thing: she doesn’t look abnormally youthful for her age. She’s aging like a normal person, whose beauty made her famous. Pamela Anderson Make-up Free is wearing her “flaws” like a badge of honor. Now she’s embracing a side of herself beyond the beauty that turned her into an icon. She’s fully getting into her “crone” season and is no longer bound by what people think of her looks.

Aging is a funny thing, as a participant in aging myself. Pamela Anderson looks like a healthy, beautiful 50+ year old woman. This is somewhat symbolic of the way we have evolved to look at appearance. Pamela is making headlines because she was known for her looks, and that is why we praise her for embracing her natural aging process.

Pamela was already pretty–yes.

Lovely Pamela isn’t the same beauty she was many years ago, and she understands this very well. We always relish when a star loses their good looks as they age, but no one seems to be feeling this way about her. Perhaps it’s because the Make-up Free Pamela Anderson is still very pretty. Watching her embrace this type of freedom is probably one of the coolest things I have seen an aging sex symbol do, in a very long time. It’s a radical act of self-love, and I wish I could bottle it and sell it.

Pamela Anderson was and is a sex symbol, and also a beacon to those of us to be okay with not looking the same way we did in our youth. Embrace the changes as you age, and you’ll find your own beauty, too.

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Some of us may have been conditioned to see getting messy as something undesirable. However, sometimes, with some people, it brings the most orgasmic of joys! Sploshing is the joy we speak of today, and all the delicious and wild ways it can be practiced, enjoyed, and expressed.

Today we’re giving you a primer on the uniquely messy fetish. This fascinating fetish involves getting messy, covered in substances like food, paint, or even mud, while enjoying the sensations involved. Whether you’re simply curious or ready to experiment, I serve to give you a primer of all things Sploshing–exploring its different types, how people practice it, and even some sexy tips for those curious about trying it out themselves.

Types of Sploshing

Sploshing is a term that actually encompasses a number of activities. Each activity is unique in its own right, but some may be more appealing to you than others.

Some of the most popular types include:

• WAM (Wet and Messy): This involves getting covered in wet, gooey substances like mud, paint, or even food. This is the most popular form.
• Sploshing, specifically with Food: Think pies, cakes, and other sweet treats. Combined with Sitophilia!
• Slime: For those who love a good squelch, slime sploshing is the way to go. This type of sploshing involves using homemade or store-bought slime to create a messy, tactile experience. You can easily find them on Instagram!
• Muddy: Getting down and dirty in mud is perfect for those who love the great outdoors!

Whatever the approach, the key to truly enjoying this kink is embracing the mess and letting go of inhibitions. Some individuals prefer to engage in solo sessions, using substances like paint or slime to create a messy, sensory experience. Others may engage in group sessions, where multiple people get together to create a wild scene!

There is truly no singular way to enjoy this naughty and stimulating activity! Sometimes, practitioners take inspiration from other fetishes and BDSM practices, a chosen substance may be used as a form of domination or stimulation.

How to Try Sploshing

Feeling intrigued? There’s no harm in trying by yourself, to see how a solo session feels. Here are a few tips to get you started:

• Start Small: Begin with a small, controlled environment, like a bathroom or designated play area. Somewhere you can be undisturbed and comfortable.
• Control the Mess, at First: Sometimes controlling the mess is helpful for some beginners! This will help you get comfortable with the idea of getting messy. Either line your playspace with clear plastic (cheap shower curtains work great!) or get a kiddie pool!
• Then, Embrace the Mess: Remember, sploshing is all about embracing the messy, sensory experience.
• Choose Your Substance: Select a substance that resonates with you, whether it’s paint, slime, or even food. Experiment with different textures and sensations, as well!
• Communicate with Partners: If you’re engaging with a partner, make sure to communicate clearly about boundaries, desires, or any safety concerns.

Is this something you’re interested in exploring? This unique, fascinating fetish can create a world of fun. Whether you engage in solo play or with a partner, we hope these tips helped give you a good primer of what to think about.

Don’t forget to let me know in the comments, or on social media, what you thought! Plus, I’m more than happy to explore new topics all the time. Send your suggestions to me on social media!

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