If you’ve never been introduced, we think you could use an introduction with some fun Temperature Play tips! As an ever-curious person, I can testify to the allure, but I also feel like it’s a very “safe” and “vanilla” way to dabble in enhanced, sensual play and BDSM. If you’re new to kinkier concepts, maybe consider first that BDSM is a wide spectrum of activities that don’t necessarily involve whips and chains– but that’s another blog post!

Pleasure and pain has been likely the most mainstream aspect of BDSM. While I won’t be diving into the spectrum of what that covers, today we’re only discussing a singular aspect that can be used in multiple ways to achieve new heights of pleasure, new sensations and create some enjoyable intimacy. The book Hurts So Good: The Science and Culture of Pain on Purpose explores even the more casual ways humans engage in masochism (the M of BDSM, from tattoos to even people who eat insanely spicy food, on purpose.

Temperature play doesn’t even have to cause pain. It can be as simple as kissing someone’s back with cold lips, or adding a chilling sensation to another body part.

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Did this awaken you sexually at too young of an age? Tell me in the comments!

What is Temperature Play?

If you came up groomed as a hetero female, you’ve probably heard the Cosmo-derived advice of, “suck on an ice cube before you go down”. Look, they’re barely even capable of using the word “penis,” but they’re onto something.

No one ever said that there isn’t such a thing as light BDSM, and realistically, that is anything outside of traditional, analog sex. The reality is, it can be fun way to spice things up. BDSM is your friend, even in a “vanilla” relationship”.

It can be as delicate or as masochistic as you want, especially when play involves heat.

Temperature Play Ideas

Some fun temperature play ideas that go beyond the typical can be fun experimentation, and can be as tame as you desire. The term “Temperature Play” is pretty broad, and usually encompasses the application of heat or cold, in the bedroom. Today, we’ll cover a few forms, to give you some ideas for the next time you’re in need of a little experimentation!

But first– let’s discuss a little bit of safety. You should be prepared for any potential burns, and make sure you aren’t removing ice directly from the freezer to produce sensations in your partner or yourself. Ice and Heat can damage the skin, so please take these safety considerations into account when you engage in temperature play for the first time.

Have something on hand to reverse whatever you’re doing. For example, keep cool water nearby for heat, or warming blankets and pads near for cold play. Make sure safety is at the top of mind, when engaging in this or any BDSM play. Utilize safe words if it helps you and your partner feel more comfortable, during your playtime.

At the end of the day, you are responsible for your and your partner’s safety, along with their consent. Now, let’s get down to the good stuff!

Ice/Cold Play Tips

Ice Play is often where many people begin, and can encompass a lot of action. Be wary of cold burns, and keep warming items on hand, should your partner need them. Warm water, towels, and blankets make for excellent accompaniments. You can incorporate ice/cold play in the following ways:

• Freeze a Glass Dildo for Insertion, or other sex toys
• Ice Cubes for melting on your partner’s nipples, skin, and other erogenous zones.
• Ice cubes to cool your mouth before oral stimulation
• Let an ice cube melt in their belly button
• Use to increase sensations on your partner’s body before performing upon them.
• Use Cold Food to lap up, from your partner’s body
• Induce pain, with pleasure. Responsibly.

Fire/Heat Play Tips

This is a fairly common kink. Personally, my first exposure to this was in the music video to Ricky’s Martin’s 1999 smash hit, “Livin’ la Vida Loca”. Anyone else remember that? Just me? Okay then.

Again, keep your partner’s safety in mind. Make sure you know how to treat a burn (both hot and cold) as accidents do happen. Here are some Fire Play Safety Tips, but here are some fun ways to play with varying degrees of heat in the mean time!

• Hot Towels
• Warming Massages
• Warming a glass or stainless steel sex toys
• Wax Play / Candle Wax (tip, do not use just any candle wax. There are candles manufactured for the explicit purpose of temperature play.)
• Carefully playing with fire, near or directly onto a person’s skin. Responsibly.
• Use of Topicals – Massage Oils, etc.

Some experts may recommend topicals which contain compounds like capsaicin. While topicals like this can provide unique sensations, it’s important to note that they can damage and burn skin. Maybe one day I’ll regale you with a story about accidental temperature play and capsaicin ointment, but that’s… another blog. 🙈 On that note, I’ll leave you with one last temperature play tip:

Capsaicin is best removed from the skin with dish soap.

It’s Playtime!

As always, any form of kink or BDSM must be approached with consent and a detailed discussion about personal limits and desires. If you’re looking for more specific Temperature Play Tips, please feel free to reach out to me on Twitter/X, or comment on the blog below!

Listen to your partner, play wisely and safely, and you’ll have something fun to incorporate into your routine whenever you’d like!

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What is Sitophilia? If you’re hungry for an answer, we can help you dabble in this savory sensation. Who knows? Maybe we’ll awaken something new in the process! Bon appétit!

Sitophilia, a term derived from the Greek words “sitos” (food) and “philia” (love), refers to a sexual fascination with food, eating, or being fed. This unique fetish transcends the conventional boundaries of sexuality, blurring the lines between sustenance and seduction. In this article, we’ll delve into the world of sitophilia, exploring its nuances and providing ideas for those interested in exploring this fascinating aspect of human sexuality.

Sitophilia: Unraveling the Fascination with Food and Sex

At its core, sitophilia is about the eroticization of food and the act of consumption. It can manifest in various ways, such as:

• Sexual arousal from watching someone eat or being fed
• Fantasizing about food-related scenarios, like being fed by a dominant partner or engaging in food play
• Using food as a prop or tool for sexual stimulation
• Associating specific foods with sexual pleasure or intimacy
• Exploring Sitophilia, SOLO

Are you wanting to give Sitophilia a try? Here are some naughty ideas to tempt your tastebuds!

Partnered Food Play:

Experiment with different textures, temperatures, and sensations. Try feeding yourself or a partner with your hands, using utensils, or even incorporating food into foreplay. Fun foods to try include cut up fruits, sauces, jello, whipped cream, and even ice cream to combine sitophilia with a little temperature play!

Explore the role of food in power play scenarios, such as a dominant partner feeding a submissive one. This can add an exciting layer of complexity to your sitophilic exploration.

Sensual Dining:

Set up a romantic dinner with a partner, focusing on the sensory experience of eating together. Pay attention to the sounds, smells, and tastes, and see how it heightens your intimacy. You can do it in silence, and under candlelight to set the mood. Let your senses take over, you hedonist! 🤭

Food Fantasies:

Have you simply let yourself drift off into fantasy? Write down your food-related fantasies, no matter how unusual they may seem. This can help you identify patterns and desires, allowing you to explore them further.

Sensory Deprivation:

Try eating in the dark or blindfolded, heightening your sense of touch and smell. This can create a new, intense experience. You can do this by yourself, or with a partner. Take the time to enjoy the textures and flavors of the food you’ve prepared.

Remember: Sitophilia, like any fetish, requires consent, respect, and open communication with your partner(s). Ensure that all parties involved are comfortable and willing to engage in these activities. As you venture into the world of sitophilia, remember to prioritize your comfort, safety, and boundaries. This fascinating aspect of human sexuality offers a unique opportunity to explore new dimensions of intimacy and pleasure. By embracing your curiosity and creativity, you can unlock a richer, more satisfying sexual experience.

Sexual taboos have been a part of society for ages! But what if I told you that some of these taboos could actually benefit you? Let’s debunk these myths and explore how embracing certain sexual taboos can be good for your well-being. This list is by no means exhaustive, and they’re certainly not all meant for everyone.

This is a list of fun ideas to help ignite the potential in your bedroom! My advice:  proceed with caution! Make sure you understand your own boundaries before making any changes in your relationship. Not all of these ideas will work for everyone, but we should all be aware of the ways “taboo” ideals can improve our love lives.

7 Sexual Taboos (That Are Good For You)

1. The Power of Role-playing

Have you ever dabbled in acting? 🎭  Whether you’re exploring a new persona or enacting a fantasy, role-playing adds an element of excitement and playfulness to your intimate encounters.

The beauty of role-playing lies in its ability to break down inhibitions. This opens a door to candid conversations about desires and preferences. You can explore hidden facets of your personality and unleash a sense of freedom in expressing your deepest fantasies. Role-playing goes beyond the physical act – it delves into the realms of emotion and imagination, enriching your sexual experiences with a touch of theatricality and intrigue.

2. Exploring BDSM Dynamics

Diving into BDSM dynamics can foster trust, communication, and a deeper understanding of your desires and boundaries. This realm of sexual exploration transcends mere physicality, delving deep into the psychology of power dynamics and consent. Contrary to misconceptions, BDSM is grounded in mutual respect and clear communication. This creates space for partners to navigate complex desires and boundaries openly.

Exploring BDSM dynamics encourages individuals to confront their vulnerabilities and communicate their needs effectively, fostering personal growth and self-acceptance. By engaging in safe, sane, and consensual practices, partners can build a strong foundation of trust and understanding, paving the way for transformative experiences that transcend the confines of conventional relationships. So, don’t be afraid to delve into the world of BDSM; embrace the complexities, explore your boundaries, and nurture a deeper sense of connection with your partner.

3. The Beauty of Sensory Deprivation

Sensory deprivation can enhance sensitivity, intensify pleasure, and increase mindfulness during intimate moments, leading to a profound sensory experience. In a world filled with constant stimuli, the art of sensory deprivation offers a unique opportunity to heighten awareness and focus on the sensations of the present moment. By limiting external distractions, individuals can delve into a state of heightened sensitivity, where even the slightest touch can send waves of pleasure through their being.

The beauty of sensory deprivation lies in its ability to create a cocoon of intimacy, where partners can connect on a profound level by immersing themselves in the sensory experience. By removing the distractions of sight, sound, and other stimuli, individuals are able to tap into their primal instincts and enhance their connection with each other. Sensory deprivation invites individuals to explore the depths of their desires and emotions, allowing for a more intimate and fulfilling sexual encounter.

4. Open Relationships: Honesty and Freedom from Sexual Taboo

This “sexual taboo” is definitely not for everyone! Be that as it may, many include it within our sexual repertoire to excellent results! To me, it boils down to more of a societal taboo. Be warned: It does require a huge unlearning process, if you’re conditioned for monogamy.

Non-monogamous relationships can provide opportunities for emotional growth, self-discovery, and the celebration of diverse forms of love and connection. The traditional view of relationships often limits the scope of love and intimacy to monogamous partnerships. By embracing non-monogamy, individuals can explore the fluidity of human connections. This allows for a deeper understanding of themselves and their capacity for love.

5. Sex Toys in the Bedroom

Integrating sex toys into your sexual repertoire can provide a lot of surprising benefits! They can enhance pleasure, improve sexual health, and encourage exploration of your own body and desires. The stigma surrounding sex toys as taboo or shameful has long inhibited individuals from exploring the vast landscape of pleasure they offer. However, incorporating sex toys into intimate encounters can lead to a deeper understanding of one’s body, preferences, and erogenous zones, enhancing the overall sexual experience.

The liberation of sex toys lies in their ability to ignite passion, creativity, and spontaneity in the bedroom, transforming routine encounters into exciting and experimental adventures. Whether used solo or with a partner, sex toys can open up new avenues of pleasure, stimulating both the body and the mind. By embracing the diverse functions and forms of sex toys, individuals can break free from societal taboos and embrace a more fulfilling and liberated sexual expression.

6. The Art of Dirty Talk

Engaging in dirty talk can heighten arousal, improve communication in the bedroom, and enhance intimacy by verbalizing desires and fantasies. The power of words in the realm of intimacy is profound, capable of evoking desire, building anticipation, and strengthening emotional bonds. Dirty talk offers a playful and exciting way to express fantasies and exercise consent. This expands intimacy, creating a shared language of intimacy between partners.

Start simple with telling them that you love how they feel. Let your creative juices flow!

7. Reclaiming Sexual Wellness Through Tantra

The essence of Tantra lies in its emphasis on presence, awareness, and intention during intimate moments, creating a space for deep emotional connection and profound pleasure. By incorporating Tantric practices into your sexual routine, you can tap into an expansive reservoir of sexual energy and connection, leading to a heightened sense of arousal and intimacy. Tantra invites individuals to explore the intersection of spirituality and sexuality, reclaiming sexual wellness as a sacred and transformative journey.

What are some other fun ideas to keep things brewing in the bedroom? Let’s get rid of the stigma of sexual taboos, together! Comment below, or let me know on social media!

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Fire Play Kink Safety Guidelines: Igniting Desire While Dousing Danger

As you crave the thrill of fire play in the bedroom, it’s essential to prioritize safety above all. The tantalizing touch of flames can elevate your sexual experience, but it demands respect and caution. Before you indulge in this scorching passion, ensure you’re well-versed in the following safety guidelines.

Preparation is Key Clear your play area of any flammable materials, and keep a fire extinguisher nearby. Invest in a fire-resistant blanket or mat to protect your skin and surroundings. Choose a well-ventilated space to prevent inhaling toxic fumes.

The Right Tools for the Job Select fire play toys specifically designed for this purpose, such as fire wands or candles with a low flame. Never use household items, like lighters or matches, as they can be unpredictable and dangerous.

Consent and Communication Discuss boundaries and desires with your partner, ensuring you’re both comfortable with the level of intensity. Establish a safe word to halt the activity if needed.

Skin Safety Perform a patch test on a small area of skin to check for any adverse reactions to the heat or flames. Keep a bowl of water or a damp cloth nearby to cool down the skin if necessary.

Fire Handling Hold the flame at a safe distance from your skin, and never leave it unattended. Keep your hair tied back, and avoid wearing loose clothing that could catch fire.

Aftercare Once the play is complete, inspect your skin for any burns or irritation. Apply a soothing balm or cream to calm the skin, and engage in gentle, relaxing activities to unwind.

By following these safety guidelines, you’ll be able to indulge in the thrill of fire play while prioritizing your well-being. Remember, safety is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

If you want tips on the Fire Play Kink, Temperature play and more, check out our blog chock full of fun sex tips: Temperature Play Tips for the Beginner